Wait For Me
by Eredis
Summary: Clare visits Eli, once again, on his hospital bed. There is something different about this visit though... "Either way, just wait, because I'll find you. I promise." Eclare.
1. I'll Find You

**A/N. Greetings, fellow fanfic readers. This is my first attempt at writing a Degrassi fanfic, because I just _had _to write an Eclare fic. It would have been a crime not to. I was a bit unsure at first, but I decided on posting it. I dedicate this fanfic to DistractedButSerious and Aradiea. DistractedButSerious is an awesome friend of mine, and Aradiea writes _amazing_ Eclare stories! So check them out afterwards!**

**This is only a one-shot, but I might be writing more Eclare in the future, so keep an eye out ;) Anyways, enjoy!**

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It was that time again.

Rays of the evening sun shone through the curtained windows. Outside, crisp leaves laid scattered on the pavements and grass, a warm autumn breeze caressing passerbys' faces. But on the inside of the building, Clare Goldsworthy slowly made her way into the familiar room. She had been introduced to this room just a month ago, but she had been here so many times already that she had memorized the exact shade of light peach of the hospital room's walls.

There, just a few feet away -though it seemed like a long distance, at her old age- lay her husband on the hospital bed. She lightly sat on the edge of the bed, so as not to disturb him; not that Eli would notice, since he could barely register anything anymore. Clare took his hand and intertwined her fingers with his, and in that moment his eyes flickered toward her, finally seeming to ackowledge her presence.

"Hey, how are you today?" she said, like she always did.

He was too weak to respond, she knew, but that didn't mean that she couldn't try. That didn't mean that she couldn't have the flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, today would be the day that he actually talked back to her. But Clare knew better. She knew what the disease what doing to him, and she knew just how little time he had left.

"I talked to Elizabeth today. She misses us, and she's sorry for not coming to visit sooner. She's actually planning on visiting next week. She's even bringing Elliot and Cristian along. So we're seeing our grandsons soon, isn't that nice?" she smiled weakly. If Eli could respond, she knew what he would say; he'd know the real reason behind the sudden visit. _There isn't much sand left in the hourglass, is there?_

She got an odd feeling in her stomach when she said that though, like she knew that Eli wasn't going to get the chance to see their daughter and grandsons next week. She ignored the feeling, convincing herself that it must have been nothing.

"It's so quiet in the house, now that you're not there. There's nothing to do, although Alli visits from time to time. Still, time seems to go by slower, without you there to keep me company." She's now reminiscing of the earlier times, when Eli would come home from work and greet her by kissing her lightly on the lips; or when they both first held their newborn daughter in wonder.

Her thoughts wandered to even earlier times, like when they'd take moonlit strolls through the park, hand in hand. Or when they were in college, and Eli would do everything in his power to distract Clare from studying or writing boring essays. She'd never forget the joy that bubbled inside her the night Eli proposed, the very same day they graduated from college.

As all these thoughts filled her head, she couldn't help but notice that even after almost a lifetime together, there were so many things left unsaid, so many things that she would have liked to do. But that's life, she supposes, there would _never _be enough time.

Still, both Eli and her have had fairly long and happy lives, even though they've had their share of rough patches. And now, well, things could have been much worse. There were some horrible ways to go; illnesses that brought along pain and suffering. But Eli was one of the lucky ones, the doctors said. He had a mental illness, but he was likely to have an easy death, most likely in his sleep. Clare was grateful he did not have to suffer.

Still, Clare would do anything to hear him talk again, to see him show more than the faintest signs of recognition. She believed -correction, she_ knew_- Eli still remembered her, even if he didn't remember other things. Just the thought of Eli forgetting her was enough to break her heart. She quickly pushed those negative thoughts out of her head.

"I'm going to miss you so much when you're gone..." She softly stroked his hand. Even if this Eli is barely a shell of what he was before, that doesn't mean she wasn't going to miss holding his hand, caressing his cheek, knowing that he was alive. It didn't mean she wasn't going to miss _him._

Just the thinking about this made Clare's eyes water up, but she did not cry. She had already accepted what he's going through, so it's as if there were no more tears left to shed. When Eli was first diagnosed, she could barely control herself, as she was so wracked up with grief. But he helped her through it, and by now she could at least keep her composure.

She spent the rest of her alloted visit time gazing at him or out the window, holding his hand and feeling his pulse, smoothing out the silvery hairs on his forehead. Much too soon, the young brunnette nurse informed Clare that she had to leave in ten minutes. _Time passed by that fast?, _she wondered.

The odd feeling in Clare's stomach returned. There was something different in the atmosphere of this visit, and she could feel it. She could tell, somehow, that when she leaves today and takes one glance back at Eli from the doorway, it's going to be the last time she sees him alive and breathing. She had to make the most of this visit, she decided, and she was going to say anything she felt she needed to. She squeezed his hand, as if to make sure he's paying attention, and she hoped he was silently doing so.

"Eli, I've got this feeling that...Well, if this were my last time here, there are some things that I'd like to say. First, I know you already know this but, I love you. Don't ever forget that," she smiles softly and takes a breath before resuming.

"Second, after you're...gone, wait for me. No matter what happens after death, be it heaven or some other type of afterlife," she still held her Christian beliefs, so of course she believed in heaven, but Eli had some different views, "It may take me as much as years, or maybe just a couple of weeks," she stopped briefly, thinking that any amount of time would feel like ages with Eli gone.

"I don't mean to sound morbid but...at my age, I don't think that my time is too far away. So don't you dare get tired of waiting and give up on me," she said that last part with a forced, soft laugh, "Either way, just wait, because I'll find you. I promise."

Suddenly, Clare feels the nurse's hand on one of her shoulders. It was time for her to leave. She rose to her feet, but didn't leave before bending over Eli and placing a soft kiss on his forehead and squeezing his hand lightly, hoping that it helped send her message through. She thought she felt him weakly squeeze her hand back, reassuringly, as if to let her know that he had heard her.

The nurse walked her to the doorway, and Clare shot one last look at Eli over her shoulder. He looked peaceful, undisturbed.

"Goodbye, Eli," she says under her breath, so softly that even the nurse didn't hear it. And with that, Clare left the room. Walking out of the hospital, she hoped that her gut feeling had been wrong. But who was she fooling? She was already bracing herself to hear tomorrow's news.

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**Like it, love it or hate it? I'd like to hear your opinion. So let me know your thoughts by reviewing! Also because reviews make you awesome ;) Constructive criticism is mucho welcomed.**


	2. Death's Bony Hand

**A/N: Hey readers. As you know, this had initially started as a one-shot, but it's now a multi-chap fic. I just got this massive burst of inspiration out of nowhere, and _had _to continue it. ****I have most of it planned out, I just have to figure out some things here and there.**

**Also, I want you to know that I don't know how long it's going to take between updates. Why? Because I leave for a residential school this Sunday. It's also an advanced school, so with all the school work I'm bound to get, I have no idea when I'll have the time to write. Sorry people.**

**Anyways, enjoy this chapter. **

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She had already been bracing herself, so Clare wasn't shocked when she got the phone call the following morning. Eli Goldsworthy had passed away in his sleep at 1:37 A.M. No pain, no suffering. Simple as that. She held the phone limply in her hand, lost for words, as the nurse explained that the body had been moved down to the morgue, and it would remain there until they received word of a funeral or cremation. Clare mumbled a soft thank you before setting the phone down and sitting on her bed, staring out the window.

Even though she had been expecting it, there was nothing she could have done to prepare herself for the void that had seemed to appear in her heart, nor prepare herself for the weeks that followed.

Elizabeth, their daughter, flew in as soon as she heard the news. No words could explain how Clare felt as she saw her daughter try explain what had happened to her sons.

"Does that mean Grandpa isn't coming back?," asked Cristian, the younger of the two.

"No, honey. Grandpa is in a much better place now. Where he is, there are no problems and no worries," Elizabeth explained softly, her eyes brimmed with tears.

"But we'll see him again someday, right?" Cristian's voice was full of hope, and Clare couldn't stop the tear that made its way down her cheek at the heart wrenching sight.

"Maybe someday, sweety. But that's a long time from now, understand?"

Clare was relieved to have someone to accompany her in her mourning, for she didn't know what she would have done if she didn't have Elizabeth to help her deal with everything. But Clare knew this wouldn't last; she'd be left alone as soon as Elizabeth had to return to British Columbia.

The reading of Eli's Last Will and Testament took place a week after his death. As expected, he had divided his possessions between his wife and daughter, with the lone exception of Morty, his hearse. He left Morty to his eldest grandson, Elliot. Elliot was only 9, but he would receive Morty when he turned 18. As Eli had put it in the will, he had left Morty to Elliot because "someday he'd meet the girl of his dreams after accidentally running over her glasses with it". Clare smiled at that, and it felt good to be able to genuinely smile again.

Eli had also specified in his will that he didn't want a funeral, wishing to be cremated instead. Elizabeth was a bit disappointed at this, but Clare already knew that was what Eli wanted, for he had told her when he was alive, a long time ago. She smiled bitterly at the memory.

"_Wouldn't you want all your loved ones to bid their last goodbyes?," Clare had asked Eli, when they were in college, at the age of 22. They had been writing a Psychology essay in which they had to give insight and express their views on mourning, when suddenly Eli had expressed he would rather be cremated than have a funeral._

"_You know the only family I have left are my grandparents. You think they'll stick around enough time to come to my funeral?" he replied, raising an eyebrow. So he had a point there._

"_But what about friends?" she asked. There was another unspoken question in there, _What about me?

"_Well if they were really my friends, they would have had plenty of time to see me _before_ I died. I don't want people I didn't even know to show up at my funeral, offering fake condolences." _

_Clare supposed that made a little sense, but there was still the hint of sadness in her eyes as she thought of Eli's body being incinerated to nothing but ashes. Eli took notice of this. He tilted her chin up so she was looking at him squarely in the eyes._

"_Hey, don't think about it. It's going to be a _long_ time till we have to worry about that anyway," he offered her a small grin. "Let's try to finish this essay. It's due tomorrow and even _I _think we've procrastinated enough."_

_She gave him a small smile. And with that, the topic was forgotten and they got back to writing._

The day after the cremation took place, Elizabeth bid her goodbyes to Clare, saying that she had to return home. Not long after that, Clare had fallen victim to insomnia and lost her appetite. What was worse, she had nothing to distract herself with, spending all her time consumed with loneliness in the house. She could no longer visit Eli, and Alli had been put into a retirement home.

So Clare spent all her time thinking, wondering when it would be her turn to leave this world and join Eli. She knew it couldn't be so far, because as each day passed, she could feel Death's bony hand closing in around her wrist.

And right she was again, because precisely three months after Eli's death, the sand in her hourglass had run out. It didn't happen in some extraordinary way. She had gone to bed as she usually did, right after bidding goodnight to a picture of Eli and her on the nightstand, and attempted to fall asleep. The only odd thing was that sleep found her rather quickly, unlike every other night, when her insomnia wouldn't let her as much as blink an eye. She did not know that sometime during the night, as she slept, her life had slipped away to another world. When she "woke up", she wouldn't be in the living world anymore...

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**Did you like it? Hate it? What are your thoughts? Tell me in a review!**

**And in case you're wondering where I'm going with this story, I'm planning on writing about the afterlife, Clare and Eli being reborn, etc. I'm still working on it, but keep an eye out ;)**


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